living on the edge

something happend on sunday. it took me three days to decide whether it was a good thing or a highly mortifying bad thing. and seeing how now im posting the tell-all it was probably a good thing. but i have doubts. it could just be me dealing with the humiliation and pretending it was good whereas actually it wasnt.
maybe i should just shut up and get on with the program.

it started of well enough. around breakfast i discovered the house is without my favorite cereal (which i eat not only for breakfast). we were only out of yogurt drink and ice cream and some other stuff. it was the end of the month. so after a cereal-less breakfast, mom, my sister and i bundled off to the nearest giant hypermarket to get the basics. we were also bored.
the only thing about the hypermart i like was the produce section. the neighbourhood giant is with some serious fun produce section. this includes the bakery, deli and the watever it is they have there. serious fun.
so there we were, my sister and i, debating about the finer points of cooking kangkung, when i thot i saw a guy who looks kinda familiar. we was prolly about, 3 aisles away, next to the onion (or was it durian?) bin. after 5 minutes of trying to rack my brain for a name and a place, i was about to pass him off as some guy who looks familiar but apparently not important enough to seriously remember.
so i made some offhand remark to my sister,'that guy looks familiar..' and ambled away leaving her with the cart. then she replied 'you prolly kno each other, he has been staring at us for the past 5 aisles'
interesting.
then i remembered la, farith (not his real name) and we met 3 plus plus years ago. and here's the bomb: i used to date him. i mean, he wasnt my boyfriend or anything but we went out coupla times but didnt hit it off and we sorta drifted apart.
there i was, with my old navy sweat pants, my kinda ratty tshirt, slippers and sunday hair (read: pony tail and couldnt be bothered) not a molecule of makeup. the only good thing i cud say was, at least i smell good. snort.
i know it shouldnt matter, i couldnt even remember his name forheavenssake, but hey, if u wanna stumble across ur ex-almost-bf any sane person wud wish u look an iota better. preferably on the arm of james denton.
anyway, deciding not to care and almost certain dat he sure as hell wont remember me, i went on with our leisurely sunday girls shopping. i ditched my sister to get some yummy chicken potato salad. but the drama aint over yet.
i was standimg in line to get my guilt food weighed and priced at the timbang counter. in front of me was this nice tudung girl. and just my luck, farith appeared out of the woodwork to stand beside her.
no cause to have a heart attack, xcept he kept glancing back. at me. i think. (he could also be checking out the nyonya behind me, but wtf). tudung girl gave some stuff for him to put in the basket he was carrying and he kept on oh-so-nonchalantly looking at me. and he wasnt very subtle about it. i almost had to physically restrain myself from patting my hair or something. sad. about 40 seconds later, i cant stand the suspense any longer and braved a smile. he sorta smiled(grimaced) back. then he turned to me and sed 'do i know u? in a very friendly, puzzled, im-seriously-not-hitting-on-u way.
i sed,'yeah, ure farith, yes? i think i kno u'
the poor bugger was even more suprised. the puzzled look squared. oh drama.
'u have no idea who i am..*smile*' i gave my salad to the timbang girl and got it back in 6 seconds flat, all the while the guy was standing in front of me, still very much clueless. tudung girl is AWOL.
deciding ive been subtly insulted enough for the day. i told him very kindly dat its okay, and u have a good day, byebye now and walked away.
all the while thinking:choi. am i really dat forgetable?
watever.
caught up with my sister at the cereal section. and part II drama: farith came up to us. 'nella kan? are u nella?' pause. then my sister calmly strolled away with the cart. oi.
'sorry i tak kenal u tadi. u had ur shades on, i couldnt remember. nampak u without ur sunglasses then baru ingat.no wonder la nampak familiar sangat'
embarassed laugh all around.
apparently im not at all that forgetable. even 17 pounds overweight and looking like a off duty drag queen.
so we chatted, a little. he was doing his degree in architecture. and he's 25 years old. wow. i dated an older guy when i was 19. i didnt know dat.
so, blah blah blah, lets exchange phone number, shall we? and this he actually said,
'wait, let me get ur number as well, last time u didnt give me your number and u never called me. i even called ur shop (i was with starbucks then) but they say they cant give out employees number. tu yang lost contact tu.
i am lousy with numbers and keeping in touch. strangely flattered dat a guy took the effort. even if it was 3 years ago.
blah blah blah, yeah we shud hang out. blah blah blah. small talk, small talk.
so we parted company with each others numbers and i regaled the tale to my mom on the way back. to which she said,'ure so fat now, noone would even recognize u. no suprise. u really should lose weight'
oi.
ahem. he called me yesterday and we talked somemore. tudung girl was his cousin. hes currently seeing someone else, as i am and love to meet up next time. specially since i live in the same neighbourhood as tudung girl's family.
so, it wasnt so bad.
why then, do i still cringe when i recalled his face wen he couldnt remember me at the salad queue, especially his face when i mentioned his name.

sigh.
every man to his day.
oh drama.